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warikoo Wanderings

I understand...

Published about 2 years ago • 4 min read

warikoo Wanderings

You can share this newsletter on WhatsApp, Twitter, LinkedIn or view it on the web.

My first book "DO EPIC SHIT" is currently #1 in India. Simple read - with no start, and no finish. Pick any page and that page will have something for you. Have you picked up a copy yet?

HOW DO YOU HANDLE DISAGREEMENTS?


Irrespective of how good a job we do, or how diligently we do it, we are invariably going to bump into someone that doesn't agree with us.
Doesn't agree with our point of view, or how we have done something, or our suggestion.

And unfortunately, we are never trained on how to handle disagreements.
In the absence of such training, we rely on our basic instincts.
And what do our basic instincts tell us?
Unfortunately, not something very smart.

Our brains, over millions of years, have evolved to do one thing really well.
Guard us against danger.
Earlier danger was in the form of wild animals, or erratic weather.
That form of danger doesn't exist as much anymore.
But the brain's job has remained the same.
Warn us of danger. And get us to act.

So today, when someone disagrees with us, our basic instincts tell us that the person is danger.
They are trying to threaten us, weaken us, confront us, argue with us, hurt us.
And since we have hardly had any learning on how to handle disagreements, our brain does what comes naturally to it.

We react.
And try to hurt back!

Ankur: "I think that people should xxxxx"
Random Person online: "Bakwaas advice. What a fake person you are, dude!"
Ankur (not trained on how to handle disagreements): "You are fake. Your family is fake. Your entire clan is fake!"

We have all been in this situation.
We don't know better. So we react.

Here is something that helped me a lot, in trying to understand disagreements:

This pyramid (I first saw it shared by Paul Graham on Twitter) is so powerful.

Here is how I use it:

  1. If someone indulges in name-calling or Ad Hominem, I do not react as a principle.
  2. For Responding to Tone and Contradiction, I simply acknowledge. My favorite acknowledgement is "I understand" - which is so harmless that there is very little space for a reaction back.
  3. For Counterargument and Refutation, I give it a patient hearing. This is my chance to hear and understand something that I may not know. I still reserve the right to reject. In which case I would say "I respect your point of view."
  4. Finally, refuting the central point is where I bow down and acknowledge the "new truth" that I have uncovered. These are the disagreements I cherish the most.

In life, there are so many skills that we were never taught in school.
Managing money, time, relationships, career, etc.

Handling disagreements I believe is one such critical skill that was completely missed out on.
I hope this helps :)

BOOK I AM READING THIS WEEK


This week I picked up Booming Digital Stars: 11 Inspiring Journeys from India’s Creator Economy

A really nice, simple read chronicling the journey of 11 digital stars of India - from Bhuvan Bam to BeerBiceps, to Prajakta Koli to Abhi & Niyu.

Every story is wonderfully crafted to share how these stars became stars, their struggles, their success, and what we can learn from their journey.

While there are enough books around mega successes, I am glad there is a book that focused on this current generation of digital celebrities in a biographical manner. Pick it up for just the right dose of inspiration :)

My favorite story of all - Bhuvan Bam - what an incredible journey!

QUOTES TO SHARE


Some startups are so poor that all that they offer their employees is money!
(Share on Twitter)

We find it hard to let go of things, when we are scared to start all over again, to build it from scratch!
(Share on Twitter)

Your first step isn't special because it was your best.
Your first step is special because it was your start.
Start today!
(Share on Twitter)

RESPONSES TO LAST WEEK'S QUESTION


Last week I asked you:

What do you in the last hour, before going to sleep at night?

  1. Read/Write/Listen to music
  2. Pray/Meditate
  3. Speak to friends/family
  4. On social media
  5. Surfing the internet
  6. Other

Here are the responses:

  1. 28% of you read/write/listen to music
  2. 22% surf the internet
  3. 19% spend time on social media
  4. 12% speak to friends/family
  5. 6% pray/meditate
  6. And around 10% watch Netflix/YouTube/something else :))

So basically, 50% of us are spending time on a screen before going to bed :((
Isn't that tragic!

One big productivity hack, towards a good sleep - do not have a screen for at least 30 minutes before you go to bed!
Your life will change.

PICTURE OF THE WEEK


My team loves me - so they made this hilarious meme :))

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION


If there was a course created on "Skills we wish we were taught in school", then which of these would you include?

  1. Managing money
  2. Managing time
  3. Managing relationships
  4. Managing career
  5. Others

Click here to let me know your answer (anonymously)​​​​

CONTENT I SHARED THIS WEEK


Podcast:
Title of episode: Finding your passion
Spotify, Amazon Music, Google Podcast, Apple Podcast, JioSaavn or Gaana.

YouTube:
Title of video: My investment approach for 2022
You can watch it here.

Instagram:
Title of video: A funny dance with my sister to celebrate 1Mn subscribers
You can watch it here.

Twitter:
Title of thread: From 5 months of cash to $2Mn in 18 months
You can read it here.

You can, of course, always write to me by simply replying to this newsletter.

I love reading all your emails, even though I may not be able to reply to them all.
Yes! I READ ALL MY EMAILS. ALL OF THEM.
​​(Sardiyon mein subah subah geele geele badaam khaane ki kasam!)

You can share this newsletter on WhatsApp, Twitter, LinkedIn or view it on the web.

warikoo Wanderings

by Ankur Warikoo

Entrepreneur, Author, Content Creator with 9M+ followers across platforms. I share this newsletter every Friday around personal growth, books, quotes, pictures - it is the most personal version of me online.

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